I managed to make it all the way through Insecticidal (2005), which is saying something, because it’s an abominably awful movie and not even in a fun way. The plot, such as it is, vaguely hinges on the usual experiment-gone-wrong. In this iteration, we meet Cami, a geeky sorority sister (you know she’s the geek because she wears glasses) who loves insects and is frustrated that her professors don’t take seriously her claim that “insects used to be the dominant species.” No duh. Cami wants to harness the “dormant genes” she is sure her pet bugs harbor and which could allow them to grow huge and gain intelligence.

Mostly what it’s about, though, is watching girls take showers and then get gored and slurped up by giant insects. Despite the fact that the doors get sealed shut by indeterminate bug excretions, and people keep stepping in unexplained slime puddles, and finding huge insect body parts here and there, it isn’t until about halfway through the movie that anyone in the house realizes something is amiss. Even Cami doesn’t get it. When she actually sees a giant bug scuttle by, she rubs her eyes, acknowledges that her sisters are right and that “I guess I really must be crazy,” even though half a dozen of her sorority sisters have already met a gory end and no one appears to miss them.

The abysmal special effects and CG-insects include lots of green gooey bug guts draped artfully on bare-breasted co-eds, and spider web that I swear is silly string.

There is so much entomologically wrong with the movie that it doesn’t merit mentioning in detail.

In the end, most (though not all) of the slutty girls die, following tried-and-true B-movie protocol, and the mean girl gets her comeuppance (she turns into a zombie-like host to a nest of maggots, which she keeps spitting out, although we don’t quite see how it happened and none of the giant insects resembles anything like a parasitic wasp or phorid fly). The remaining sorority sisters finally kill the bugs with  a combination of electrocution and household appliances.

There, I’ve told you how it ends, so now you don’t have to rent it.